so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
