I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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