"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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