bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
