i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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