just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
