Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Its about making memories worth repressing
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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