Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
