Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
