OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize