Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
