i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
How does one acquire holy water?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
