I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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