I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Randomize
