so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
