It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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