if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
