Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
