i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
