thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
operation harelip BJ is a go
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
