Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I FOUND THE LEGS
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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