we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
