That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
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