why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
