No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
