People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
