i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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