Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Randomize
