so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize