did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize