we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize