Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
