after a month anything with tits is on the radar
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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