okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
