Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize