Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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