Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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