the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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