stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
