You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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