Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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