im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
