Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
