Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
