I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
