Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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