So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
