In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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