I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
where am i from again
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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