its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
