marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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