the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
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